As the year draws to a close, I reflect that it’s been, as Mark Twain put it, “One damned thing after another.” Some good, some not-so-good, some most excellent, some terror-inducing. Whatever is happening, however, I remember the mantra, “This too shall pass!”
Life sometimes sideswipes us with occasions for rejoicing or unspeakable tragedy, but hard times run in cycles. It’s important to find ways of reminding ourselves of this rhythmic nature. Outward-facing periods of great vigor and challenge are followed by periods of apparent stagnation. These fallow times can feel like the pits of despair when nothing seems to be changing (except for the worse) and no matter how hard we engage with the problems in our lives, we seem to make no discernible progress. Winter is never going to end; all our senses convince us of it. We are never going to find “the one,” or sell that first story. And we’ve heard enough tales of folks who actually never do find a partner or make a sale that we are sure we belong in that group. As the days shorten and snow or rain turns into mud, we become even more certain the sun will never return.
That’s when I need black belt survival tools. My mantra (above) is one of them. Here are some others that work for me.
- Every day, I speak with someone who loves me.
- I try to do a daily act of kindness in a way that I will not be found out.
- I try to begin each day with trust and end it with gratitude. These can take whatever form seems good to me on that day.
What helps get you through winter blues?
Getting through bleak times?
* Try to be busy (thus my feverish mask-making for the last going on two years) in a way that makes me feel like I’m helping with a problem.
* Remember/read history. For example, January 6th isn’t the only time a coup was plotted against the US government—it’s just the most recent, florid attempt. And somehow the pendulum has swung back. Not a guarantee, but it’s good to remember.
* Love the people around me as best I can. Which is usually a lot.